


I'm having the lasagne....what about you?

by hobbeshalftail3469



Category: Cormoran Strike Series - Robert Galbraith
Genre: First Kiss, Fun and Games, actually going out, pretending to be going out, snogging in public
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-28 12:09:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15706938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobbeshalftail3469/pseuds/hobbeshalftail3469
Summary: Based on a prompt from LulaIsAKittenThe idea is that Robin has told her mum that she's with Strike in order to shut her up, but they actually have to go through with pretending when she visits London....oh, and Nick and Ilsa get involved to stir things up even more!It's fun and daft!





	1. Chapter 1

Strike heard Robin’s familiar footsteps on the stairs as she arrived in the office after a morning trawling through records at one of the various town halls she was now increasingly familiar with.  
His office door was open and he frowned as he threw his empty takeaway boxes into the trash….she usually at least shouted a ‘Hi’ to him.  
“What’s up with you?” he asked as he made his way towards her desk.  
Robin raised her eyes to his and opened her mouth, but huffed and closed it again.  
Strike shook his head and flopped down on the farting sofa before he directed a pointed and businesslike glare in her direction.  
“Come on, what’s going on with you? You haven’t been right since you got back from Masham last week. Did something happen? Was it Matthew again?” he asked the final question more gently.  
Robin shook her head and returned his look, needing him to know that he was on the wrong track. She wanted to tell him; she knew she couldn’t avoid it….but she was hugely embarrassed. She also knew however that he wasn’t going to budge until she’d given him something.  
“OK; but …..oh God…..please don’t be angry!” she eventually managed to spit out.  
Cormoran’s face remained calm, he was worried about his partner, but if that dickhead Matthew had hurt her further he couldn’t promise not to want to mash the front of his face in.  
“When I went back home my mum had set me up on a date with someone I used to go to school with……he was a real idiot at school and I soooo didn’t want to go. So I kind of told her I was seeing someone….in London,” she started.  
Strike sensed that she wasn’t quite finished and knew that she’d fess up more if he just remained silent and focussed on her.  
“Well, it probably wouldn’t have been an issue except she’s just messaged me; she’s coming down at the weekend…..and the person I told her I was seeing is you,” she gulped down a mouthful of water, wishing it was something stronger, and screwed up her face.  
Strike’s own eyebrows shot up and he was momentarily speechless – she’d invented a boyfriend, fine….but she’d selected HIM!!!   
“Look, I can cover, we’ve got a day to plan something – we could say you’re away on business or something. She’s only here Friday and Saturday night…..it’ll be fine,” she flustered, trying to run possibilities around in her head of how she could ensure her mother didn’t suspect where her new boyfriend was for a weekend. “She wants to see the office though….says she wants to put a mental image to where I spend my days! Could you be out Friday afternoon?”  
Strike sighed ruefully and dragged his large hand across his face, scratching at the stubble which had begun to show through, it having been more than 4 hours since he shaved.  
“I can’t….got a client coming in at 4pm….just arranged it and added it to the schedule this morning,” he sniffed, “It’ll be OK, I’ll just go along with it.” He stood up and went across to the kettle in order to ensure that his expression didn’t give too much away about the torrent of emotions swirling around within him.  
Shit, shit, you stupid fucker. Why the hell have you agreed to this? You could have got out of it…..shit she even gave you a suggestion!  
Robin sucked her cheeks in as she risked a glance in his direction as he seemed to just matter of factly get on with making tea…..as if him pretending to be her boyfriend was just an everyday occurrence!  
“Well, she suggested taking us out of a meal…..somewhere local – I suggested the Tottenham…” she trailed off as Cormoran turned towards her.  
“Yeah…..no problem. And she’d coming here….to see the office?” he glanced around, wondering exactly what impression she’d derive from the shabby but serviceable rooms.  
Robin nodded, keeping her lips tightly pressed in a narrow line.  
“Is it too weird?” she asked, wincing. “I just got so fed up with her going on and on about me getting out meeting someone, and then she organised Troy…”  
Strike’s eyebrows shot up again, “Troy? Jesus…..it was weird until you mentioned that….now anything would be justifiable! Who the hell names a kid Troy?” he laughed.  
Robin shrugged her neck, “I think the phrase ‘those in glass houses’ springs to mind!” and sniggered.  
“Hey! I’m a Cornish giant, not a place where some beautiful woman lived!” he smirked. The kettle boiled and he poured tea for them both without asking first.  
“She’ll only want to chat and stuff, and on Saturday I’ll take her down Oxford Street all day…so…..” she drifted off thinking about what she was actually asking Cormoran to do.  
“Well, she’d not exactly gonna want to see me stick my tongue down your throat is she!” he grinned. “It’ll be fine; and if it gives you less grief from them it’ll be worth it.”  
He put her tea down and took his back into his office; he needed to contemplate his equilibrium….and it was seriously out of kilter!  
Robin blew on her tea…..bugger, buggery and piss……..this was going to be weird; it was going to freak him out just when things had started to be becoming nice and comfy between them again. Immediately after she’d split from Matthew things had been a little odd – for a start she’d had a very serious reaction to him in terms of not being able to focus on anything except his enormous masculinity whenever she saw him; making their close working relationship rather strained for a while. But, she’d come through all that….at least that’s what she told herself, although she did still have to fight the urge to slip her fingers between the buttons on his shirt occasionally; OK, not occasionally, most days in fact!  
BUT; he was Cormoran….her friend and colleague first and foremost, and she didn’t want to throw that away.  
She finished up at her desk and shouted through that she was heading off at about 5.30pm and he shouted back a reminder that he was doing some early surveillance in the morning so she would have to open up.  
___________  
Alone in his small flat he’d tried to process Robin’s admission properly, he could understand her parents looking out for her, and even wanting her to move on from the knobhead Matthew; and he could sort of understand her coming up with the imaginary boyfriend ploy – shit he’d used it himself when Lucy had got on his nerves – but she’d not come up with someone imaginary, she’d said him! Fuck!  
Since her split from her twat husband he’d had to keep a tight leash on his emotions. She looked sexier by the day and he could swear that she was starting to soften a little towards him – there had been a point when she’d avoided him and sprung away from the slightest contact with him – but over the past few months he thought he’d caught her looking at him in a different way on a couple of occasions….and now this.  
He could pretend to be with her for a meal with her mother…..he’d only have to put his arm around her, maybe a chaste kiss….or 2…….bit of hand holding.  
Fuck, even the thought of it was making him hard! It had been a pretty long dry spell for him. Shit!  
________  
They hardly saw each other Friday morning due to Strike’s surveillance, and at lunchtime Robin was out again at the records office. So it was about 2pm when they finally caught up with each other in one of the local pubs.   
“What time train is she on?” Strike asked as he sipped his pint.  
“Due to get into King’s Cross at just after 4pm,” she nodded, gulping her wine down probably quicker than usual – not unnoticed by a smiling Strike.  
“Then I’ll check her into accommodation – she’s got a studio place in Cartwright gardens, dead handy for the station actually – and we’ll come here. She wants to see where I work, erm, you’ll be there obviously, and then we can go for a wander around and meet you at the Tottenham about 7ish. Does that sound OK?” she continued, gulping down more wine and trying not to make eye contact with her partner.  
He nodded, trying to reign in his rising excitement. Don’t be so fucking ridiculous man, get a grip!  
They started to discuss work; and time flew, as it often did when they got engrossed in picking apart the finer details of cases together.  
Robin made her way out of the pub in time to meet the train leaving Strike nursing a third pint.  
______  
Noises and footsteps on the metal staircase signified their arrival. Strike liked Linda, she was down to earth, straight talking and allowed Robin to follow her dreams.  
He smiled, sniffed and ambled out into the outer office to greet them both.  
“Linda! Lovely to see you again,” he gave her a warm embrace before moving towards Robin, “Everything OK?” he asked, slipping his arm around her waist as if it was the most natural thing in the world.  
Robin felt herself arch against him as his soft lips pressed against her forehead and she felt a slight flutter to her eyelids.  
“Yep, all fine…the apartment place is great; she’s even got a mini kitchen!” Robin grinned, widening her eyes as she realised Strike hadn’t removed his hand and in fact his thumb seemed to be rotating against the hem of the top she had changed into (a pressie from her mum from her favourite boutique back home)…if he keeps doing that he’s going to find skin she thought.  
“Right, lovely ladies, I’ve got a few bits to finish off, then I should consider making myself presentable and I’ll see you about 7, OK?” he released Robin from his side with a quick squeeze and went back into his office, trying to subdue the thought that his thumb had just grazed against Robin’s bare skin and his lips had momentarily brushed against her face….and her hair. It had smelled like cherries.  
Robin showed off the office, as much as was possible and a short while later he heard them shout a hasty, “Bye!” as they made their way out to show Linda the delights of Soho!  
“I’m really glad about you two,” Linda said, squeezing her daughter’s arm as they walked down the streets so familiar to Robin now. “He’s just so right for you, and he clearly adores you!”  
Robin masked a smile, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that had rushed through her when he’d softly kissed the top of her head and squeezed her waist!  
_____  
Strike breathed deeply as he realised he was alone again. He had to hold it together for a few hours in the pub, that was all, then say goodnight and that was it. He could do that.  
After finishing up and locking the office he made his way up to his small flat and showered. He considered carefully what to wear – he didn’t want to go too smart; it was just the Tottenham after all; but he wanted Linda to think he’d made an effort – if he was supposed to be Robin’s man then she would want him to make an effort for her daughter. In the end he decided on a pair of dark charcoal trousers which were a fairly recent purchase together with a white, long sleeved, linen shirt. He shaved and trimmed his facial hair and swirled round mouth wash as well as brushing his teeth and added a dab of aftershave. It wasn’t cold, so he opted for deep fawn coloured jacket and nodded at the result – apart from his rebellious hair he looked OK!  
The Tottenham was it’s usual hub of activity when Linda and Robin arrived there. They secured a small table and Robin fetched white wine for herself, a gin and tonic for her mum and a pint ready for Strike.  
Mother and daughter chatted and caught up, as they often do, moving from topic to topic with seamless ease.   
Just before 7pm Robin spotted Strike arrive and made a sharp inhalation….he looked gorgeous; that was quite simply the only word for it. And the fact that he’d spotted them and was smiling his eye crinkling grin as he made his way across to them made her heart flutter…..and her thighs grow hot.  
“Hi again,” he noted their half full drinks and his own pint, “Budge up,” he indicated for Robin to scoot along the bench seat and he sidled in after her, his arm encircling her shoulders, giving her a slight squeeze. Before she knew what was happening she’d turned her face towards him and he was kissing her – just a small, tender kiss on her lips, punctuated with the word , “Hello!”  
Robin smiled and allowed herself to melt against his side as he turned towards Linda and started to engage her in a discussion about the various sights Robin had shown her around the offices; Soho Square and the various theatres etc.  
They chatted and drank amicably whilst Robin tried to focus her breathing and stop herself from taking her fingers for an adventure between the casually loose spaces between the buttons on that white shirt.  
Cormoran suggested they should wander down and get some food – he’d popped in earlier and asked for a table to be set aside for them. His manners were impeccable as always, making sure Linda and Robin were both settled before he took his own seat.  
“What do you recommend?” Linda asked, surveying the menu which both Robin and Strike knew off by heart.  
“It’s all good – pretty standard fare, but good quality, and we like the atmosphere in here….it’s where I finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!” Strike smiled, waggling his eyebrows towards Robin.  
She blushed and rolled her eyes slightly, but went along with his story,   
“Yeh, finally! I gave you enough clues…..wasn’t exactly subtle!” she grinned and reached out for his hand; intertwining her fingers with his on the table.  
“Well, I’m thrilled about it, and so’s your father. It’s not too much of a burden on work though is it?” Linda asked.  
Cormoran shook his head, “No, it’s going Ok so far. We have a strict ‘no snogging in the office’ policy!”   
Robin almost snorted the remains of her white wine into her glass – a combination of Strike’s comment and recognising a familiar face across the dining space. What the hell was Ilsa doing here?  
Ilsa’s eyes were scanning their table and she had clearly spotted the hand holding, even if she hadn’t there was no way she’d miss what happened next.  
Linda giggled naughtily and said, “Well, we’re not in the office now, don’t mind me!”  
And Strike responded, “I know better than to ignore a girl’s mother,” and pulled Robin into a full blown kiss; lips parted, eyes fluttering closed, the tip of his tongue exploring her warm lips.  
Linda gave a tiny squeal of delight and clapped her hands, “How lovely! Right, I’m having the lasagne and popping to the loo.”  
The drink Ilsa had been drinking was in the process of being dabbed from the blouse of the woman opposite her as Linda left the table; Robin and Strike recovered their breathing a little and before Robin could mention a word Ilsa popped up filling Linda’s seat.  
“Shit!” Strike nearly jumped out of his skin.  
Ilsa’s face was an absolute picture and her phone was already out, “Ok, so I know that’s Robin’s mum, so this isn’t a job…..why are you two snogging? Have you finally asked her?” she directed the final comment to her childhood friend who was trying unsuccessfully to silence Ilsa’s excited ramblings.  
Robin tried to look at both of them at once – what did she mean by asking Cormoran if he’d finally asked her? Does that mean ask me? Ask me what? Has he been talking to Ilsa about asking me out?   
“Look, long story, but Linda thinks we are going out together….it involves avoiding a date with a ‘Troy’ so we’re going along with it, OK?” Strike hastily explained.   
Ilsa grinned wider than ever, “Oh right……forcing yourself, because you’re a good friend, right?” she grinned.  
“Yes, exactly!” Strike eyeballed her grin with a ‘don’t fucking go there’ look.  
Ilsa turned her attention to her phone, “What are you doing?” Robin enquired.  
“Texting Nick, getting him down here…..he’d never let me live it down if he missed this!” she twinkled and swiped her phone away before either could stop her.  
Linda was making her way back towards the table as Ilsa laughed like a mischievous child before returning to her table.  
Cormoran sighed. What was already going to be a difficult evening was now, potentially going to become a bloody nightmare!  
Robin sighed. They’d kissed; and it hadn’t felt like an act from him; and it certainly hadn’t been an act from her….and he’d been talking to Ilsa about asking her out…..and she had to somehow eat.  
They ordered food and more drinks – Linda switched to wine, so they ordered a bottle. Both Robin and Strike tried to avoid making eye contact with Ilsa – he took off his jacket and rested his arm around Robin’s shoulders, or squeezed her hand until their food arrived.  
It was the kind of place where you could keep your table after eating, so once the plates were cleared they remained seated and continued talking about a wide range of topics – Robin had to admit that Cormoran was certainly pulling out all the stops and being a very attentive and successful fake boyfriend!  
She’d downed 3 glasses of white wine and was enjoying her proximity to Strike; the fact that she could loll her head against his wide shoulder and smell the erotic mixture of beer, tobacco and aftershave was having serious effects on her ability to make her brain and fingers connect.  
Eventually, either her fingers or her brain said ‘Fuck it!’ and she finally slotted her fingers into the space between the buttons on his shirt allowing them to stroke the soft, dense hair of his chest and resulting in a hitch to Strike’s breathing together with a look down at her that was eloquence itself.  
“Oggy!” came the shout across the room, which was now pretty heaving with people, breaking the mood.  
Nick and Ilsa came giggling across to the table, “Ilsa, Nick….you remember my mum, Linda?” Robin made the introductions.  
“Of course, Linda, nice to see you again,” Nick smiled and reached out to grasp Robin’s mum by the shoulder warmly. “So, have these two invited you tomorrow?” he asked grinning like a cheshire-cat.  
Robin’s face fell, Strike cast a ‘what the fuck are you doing?’ look towards his friend, who just grinned and raised his eyebrows.  
“Drinks at our house tomorrow Linda. There are just a few people coming round, but we’d arranged it before you decided to come down….you’re more than welcome though, we’d love to have you all!” Ilsa smiled.  
“Oh, how lovely. Yes, we haven’t got plans have we Robin?” Linda looked at her daughter.  
Robin opened and closed her mouth several times, “Er….no…..no plans….have we Cormoran?” she finally managed to spit out.  
“Yeah, an evening of drinks round at the Herbert’s, funny it had slipped my mind,” Cormoran glowered at Nick.  
Robin could tell that her mum was getting tired, so decided to make a move. Cormoran grabbed his jacket and whispered in Nick’s ear,  
“I’ll fucking kill you!”  
“Give her a kiss night night from me!” Nick laughed back, making ridiculous lip smacking noises towards Strike who shook his head, but couldn’t help grin a little.  
A couple of tube stops and a short walk reached Linda’s studio. The whole time Strike had been in contact with Robin, his arm around her waist, or holding and pressing his lips to her hand every so often when Linda glanced across. Robin nipped in to collect the top she’d worn to work and changed out of earlier.  
“Listen love….I’m really happy for you and Cormoran. You look so happy with him, darling. I’m sure it was how it was always meant to be,” and she hugged Robin and kissed her goodnight.  
She’d almost expected Strike to have gone when she came out, but of course he wouldn’t have gone; he would never leave Robin out that late on her own. He had however lit up a cigarette and was dragging on it mercilessly as she appeared.  
They walked without saying a word until they’d rounded the corner of the crescent and as if by some invisible signal both stopped and roared with laughter.  
“Oh. My. GOD!!” Robin shrieked, “Ilsa!!!!!and Nick!!!!”  
Cormoran was clutching at his sides, “The only thing I am loving is that they are now gonna have to arrange and pay for a drinks party at very short notice just so that they can spend an evening mocking us again!” he stubbed out his cigarette and wiped his eyes.  
Robin was laughing really hard and bent slightly, she kept trying to make herself stop, but failing and after about 5 minutes she started wailing, “Oh no! I’m gonna pee if I laugh much more!” which of course made Cormoran start up laughing again.  
Aiming for Goodge Street Tube they managed to reach a small, hipster coffee place which was still open. They went in while Robin used the loo and Strike found himself ordering coffees, which arrived in what looked like test tubes; the sight of which reduced them to uncontrollable giggles again.  
“Well, I can honestly say that as fake boyfriends go, this has definitely been an enjoyable date!” Robin smiled as they prepared to separate – Robin for the tube, he for the short walk back to Denmark Street. “Thank you Cormoran,” she added shyly.  
“It was my pleasure,” he smiled warmly, “Although you realise we have to do it all again tomorrow evening thanks to our dear friends!”  
Robin sniggered again, “Yeah, remind me to cross them off the Christmas card list!” She cast her gaze down to his shirt, it was now looking a little crumpled in that ‘worn in’ linen kind of look and her mind was taken back to the delicious sensation of feeling his chest against the tips of her fingers.  
Cormoran looked down at Robin, he couldn’t help but think back to earlier in the evening when he kissed her…..it hadn’t felt like she was acting when she kissed him back….and she DID kiss him back.  
“You know, Nick told me to give you a kiss goodnight from him,” he rumbled huskily, leaning a little closer to her.  
Robin was intensely aware of how close she was to him, but she didn’t want to move away. She lifted her head, “I’d rather have one from you,” she purred, meeting his eyes with a look of pure desire.  
He stifled the small moan she let out with his mouth, and this time there was no doubt about whether they were acting.  
His arms pulled her towards him and crushed her against his chest; Robin’s hands were trapped between them, flat against the broadness of his chest, but able to rub their way towards the skin visible above his open shirt collar.  
They kissed intensely with an almost obscene disregard for their public location. His growls and insistent tongue in her mouth made Robin’s normally reserved nature collapse and she matched the ferocity of his kisses with her teeth and lips.  
Eventually they broke apart, panting,  
“So what was Ilsa talking about when she said have you finally asked her?” Robin gasped as Cormoran’s tongue and lips continued their thorough investigation of her neck as he finally got the opportunity to entwine his fingers through her honey coloured hair.  
“I was pissed at hers, ages ago……told her I wanted to ask you out……said I didn’t think I had a chance…..she told me I should…..I didn’t listen,” he replied between breathless onslaughts on her neck.  
“You should have asked me….I’d have said yes,” Robin replied, causing him to instantly cease kissing her.  
“Yeah? Well, I’m asking now…..would you like to go out with me……preferably without your mum this time!” he panted, looking hopefully at her for her answer.  
Robin grinned and nodded enthusiastically, moving her hands to encircle his neck and pressing hungry kisses to his lips.  
“Is…… that a …….yes?” he asked, struggling to form words, but grinning against Robin’s warm and passionate kisses.  
She paused enough to say, “YES!” and was about to begin kissing him again when he placed his fingers over her lips to quell her.  
“Let’s get our own back though….let’s not tell Nick and Ilsa tomorrow…..” and he trailed the sentence allowing Robin to ponder the concept.  
She looked thoughtful and wrinkled her nose, fuck she looks sexy when she does that he thought as he allowed his hands to wander down and cup her deliciously pert arse…because now he really could!  
“So you want us to pretend to be going out together in front of my mother and your friends; who think they know that we are pretending; rather than actually tell them that we are now going out together, just so that we get our own back on them?” she queried.  
Strike listened carefully and nodded, smiling at the end.  
“Sounds like a wonderful idea!” she giggled and kissed him again.  
“Shall I walk you home?” Cormoran asked as they surfaced for air.   
“Your’s is closer,” Robin whispered into his ear, biting down gently on his ear lobe as he inhaled deeply and started to walk very quickly in the direction of his flat, dragging a giggling Robin after him.


	2. The morning after

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so this is the morning after.   
> I've kept it as 'M rating - there are mentions of what they got up to but no actual sex being described - hope that's OK with everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone remembers the episode of Friends where Monica and Chandler are getting together and Joey, then Rachel, then Phoebe find out....well I kinda stole a bit!

Cormoran became slightly awake and aware of unusual sounds and movements in his flat. He dragged his hand across his hair and chin; it smelled of sex….and Robin…..oh yeah….it smelled of Robin sex!  
He grinned widely and shuffled up in bed onto his shoulders, opening his eyes fully to the sight of a naked Robin jumping on tiptoes to try to reach a piece of black clothing lodged on one of the ceiling beams.  
Her bottom lip was clasped between her teeth and her breasts looked glorious,  
“Is that boob jiggle an attempt to get me excited again?…..cos if it is…,” and he indicated the sheet and a familiar morning tent pole!   
Robin rolled her eyes slightly at him, but continued her focussed endeavours,  
“I need to get ready…..and go!” she hissed, losing patience and reaching for a biro to see if she could poke the item down.  
“OK, but how is my sock necessary for that?” Strike asked, having glanced at the time and groaned, doing a rough calculation that he’d possible had a grand total of 2 hours 20 sleep.  
“Oh, I thought is was my pants….I can’t find them,” she ceased her focus on the sock and moved the duvet slightly to resume her search.  
Strike, pursed his lips and made his mind think back to the events after they reached the flat, “They’ll be over there somewhere,” he indicated the lower left side of the bed.  
Robin followed his gesture and found them instantly,”How did you know that?” she asked, hastily pulling them on.  
“Because I removed them from you last night,” he grinned and grabbed for her, catching her around the hips and pulling her onto the bed with him, giggling, “and that’s where I threw ‘em!” he continued, covering her neck in hungry kisses.  
Robin panted against him and squirmed to free herself, reluctantly.  
“But I need to go,” she stated.  
“Why? It’s the weekend, and if you’re thinking of going into work I have it on pretty good authority that the boss will give you the day off!” he then yawned so widely that it looked painful and rolled over to look up at her, grasping her pillow and inhaling ‘eau de Robin.’  
“I’m meeting my mum….we’re shopping today and I need to get back to my flat, get changed then meet her….so I have to go!” and she kissed the end of his nose.  
“Why do you have to go to yours? Haven’t you got a shit load of spare stuff to wear in the office? You can shower here and meet your mum here instead,” he waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively, “that’d give us at least an hour….and you KNOW what I am capable of doing to you in an hour…….twice!” he grabbed her pliant arm and trailed kisses along the soft underside, making Robin wriggle and start to feel deliciously moist again.  
“I suppose I could get changed here,” she conceded, earning a happy little grunt from Strike as he started to remove the bra she’d put back on, “But I can’t suggest meeting here….she’d know we’d….you know….”  
Strike stopped his investigation of her deliciously firm breasts and regarded her with amusement;  
“Robin, you’re 27, I’m approaching 40! I think she’d be less surprised if you weren’t sleeping with me!” he laughed.  
“Yeah, but we were only pretending yesterday,” Robin continued.  
“Exactly….she already thought we were together even before we actually were, so what’s the issue with her thinking we’ve had sex? Anyway, I’m not suggesting inviting her in to help pick up the condoms…..just meet downstairs! We’re on 55 minutes and counting by the way,” and wrapped his arms back around Robin’s naked back, splaying his hands wide across the smoothness of her skin and shuddered with a sudden flashback to the previous night.  
Robin smiled against him, enjoying the feel of his large hands against her skin….God he had good hands!  
“I’ll have to message her,” she conceded.  
Cormoran growled deliciously against her ear, “You’re saying all the right things Robin,” and released her to reach for her phone. She was back instantly, as was his tongue on her skin, and she managed to type out a quick but informative message and send it to her mum as Cormoran enjoyed the experience of removing her knickers all over again.  
\------  
43 minutes later and they lay face down on the mattress, covers kicked aside, sweating and blissful.  
“I have to admit…..on this occasion…..I have absolutely no idea where your knickers are!” Strike panted.  
“I’ve got about 16 minutes to get up, showered and dressed and meet my mum,” Robin spluttered, sitting up and extracting her arm from beneath Cormoran’s stomach with a grunt.  
“I’ll stay here, out the way……and partly because I can’t actually move!” Strike drooled into his pillow.  
Robin giggled and slapped his bare backside as she wriggled up and padded around the small room locating clothing. She threw on Cormoran’s shirt from the previous night as a make do robe and showered in his tiny bathroom quickly, noting that her cheeks had a definite rosy glow to them….and her lips were very full and red.  
She trotted downstairs in the shirt and located a pair of leggings, socks and flat brogues from her supply of ‘quick change clothing’ stashed in the office. She decided she liked Strike’s shirt, so she unthreaded the belt from her trousers and added it on top, making a baggy shirt dress. She applied her usual, barely there make up and found Strike snoring gently when she went back into his bedroom.  
She smiled and placed a kiss on his shoulder and heard a muffled and very sleepy;  
“Just gi’ me a minute……I’ll be good to go again, promise….” which made her chuckle out loud,  
“Yeah!….any minute now babe!” she grinned and placed a hastily scribbled note next to the bed before letting herself out.  
Her mum was just walking up the road as Robin emerged and they greeted each other warmly,  
“You look a bit flushed and happy…..fun night was it?” Linda asked, her eyes twinkling – it was great to see her daughter looking so comfortable, confident and happy.  
“Muuuum!” Robin shrieked, nudging her playfully “But I am starving!”

Later in the day Cormoran finally got up and showered. He saw and smiled as he read Robin’s note,  
“How can I possibly forget drinks at the Herbert’s!” he sighed as he put the note back on the drawers.  
He tidied up the mess that his flat had become; he finally retrieved his lone sock from the ceiling beam and smiled at the memory of Robin’s naked body stretching up for it earlier on. Many images of the previous evening came back to him as he put the shambolic bed back in order. He located and dealt with the 1,2, 3 and shit where was the 4th….oooh, there it was, used condoms wrapped in tissue and made a mental note to restock the drawer by the side of his bed.  
He was starving when he was finally dressed and happy enough to leave the flat [he had no idea where his white shirt was, but gave up the hunt!] – he visited his favourite arabian café for a hearty and spicy meal and a sweet tea, smoking on the way,and nipped home via Boots.  
He sent a message to Robin:  
‘Is there anything left to buy down Oxford Street? By the way, have you seen my shirt? C x’  
A response came back quickly:  
‘Wearing shirt. Smells like you. Bought some new knickers so you can take them off me! R xx’  
Strike breathed deeply at the thought and turned his attention to his usual weekend routine; he dropped off and collected his clothes from the laundry he used a couple of streets away, knowing that he’d need one of the nicer shirts they had there for the evening at the Herbert’s. He then did his weekly clear out of his and the work’s fridge and restocked milk, biscuits and tea bags.  
‘Having afternoon tea with mum at Liberty’s. Are you OK to meet us at Nick and Ilsa’s? Rxxx p.s. Missing you a bit x’  
Cormoran grinned as he read the message from Robin;  
‘Meet you there at 8. I’ll bring wine. C xx p.s. Missing me a bit, or a particular bit of me?!’  
A few moments later:  
‘Rude!!! But since you ask, bit of both! R’ and she’d added the emoji showing a wink and sticking out tongue which made him laugh outloud.  
At a bit of a loose end, as he often was at weekends, he went down into the office and spent a couple of hours tidying paperwork and adding details to computer files on cases with his 2 finger, focussed typing.  
\-----  
Robin and Linda had a full day together before stopping by Robin’s small flat in order for her to change, then they went via Linda’s rental place for her to titivate herself a little and they made their way to Nick and Ilsa’s. On the way Robin told her mum a little more about their friends and their relationship to them. Linda was thrilled that her daughter seemed so happy and settled in London – she didn’t say, but she was quite envious of Robin’s exciting life, and she loved living vicariously through her!  
“Oggy not with you?” Nick asked as he answered the door.  
“He’s meeting us here…..but he’ll be late, you know him!” Robin giggled as she removed her jacket and gave Nick a kiss.  
“Oh I know him……and of course so do you!” he smiled wickedly.  
Robin stifled the urge to reply, “Too bloody right I know him!!!” but instead she took her mum through to the large kitchen where there were several of Nick and Ilsa’s work colleagues and the neighbours….not bad at last minute notice, thought Robin.  
Ilsa came over, “Corm not with you?” she asked, kissing both Linda and Robin.  
“Meeting them here…..they’re not joined at the hip Ilsa!” Nick chastised his wife, much to her obvious amusement.  
“Well, I’ll do some introductions….” And Ilsa proceeded to engage Linda and Robin in conversation with a friendly group of her work friends.  
About 8.20pm the doorbell rang and the shout of ‘OGGY!!!!’ could be heard from Nick.  
“Why does he call him Oggy?” Linda asked Robin and Ilsa.  
“No idea!” both replied simultaneously.  
Strike made his way through the house passing wine to Nick and greeting Ilsa with a hug and a kiss before turning his attention to Robin. He gave Linda a quick kiss on the cheek and slipped his arm around Robin’s hips to squeeze her arse whilst giving her a fairly lingering and hot kiss on the lips.  
“You look good,” he whispered after giving her tight black jeans and baggy emerald top a once over. She was wearing heeled boots, making her only a couple of inches shorter than him, and the shoulder of the top slouched down to reveal a pleasing amount of her skin.  
“Thank you, so do you,” she twinkled at him, allowing her hand to snake around and rest in his back pocket. He was wearing a pale blue shirt, open at the collar and a pair of nut brown jeans. Strike made a fairly big deal of making his arm ‘comfortable’ around Robin and smiling at Nick and Ilsa, and Robin tilted her head in the direction of her mum for good measure.  
Ilsa and Nick watched the interaction; the difference in their reactions was hilarious! Nick grinned and waggled his eyebrows at the pair, Ilsa stood open mouthed and pulled Nick into the utility room to get more wine.  
Nick continued to giggle but his wife’s face and reaction perplexed him.  
“What’s up with you? That was hilarious…..anyone would think they are a pair….it’s clever how they do it….I bet Oggy’s as stiff as hell!!!!” he gabbled.  
Ilsa coughed, “Niiiick!” she stated, fixing him with a pointed stare.  
“What?” he asked sheepishly.  
“They are clearly not pretending! Go back and have a look again,” Ilsa suggested, moving to the door and opening it a fraction to peer through. She stifled a gasp and a squeal as she jesticulated to where Robin’s hand was firmly rubbing against Strike’s crotch behind her – completely unseen by Linda and therefore not in any way part of the ‘pretence’!  
“Shiiiiit!!!! They’re together! They are not putting this on for Linda at all!” Nick gasped.  
“But, hang on, “ Ilsa stated smiling “They don’t know that we know the pretending is all pretend…..sooooo!”  
Nick looked blankly at his wife.  
“We’ve got leverage! They think that we think they are still pretending……we have the upper hand!” she explained with glee.  
“Ilsa love, why?” Nick asked, shaking his head, “Robin and Oggy are clearly together!”  
“Yes, I know, but they don’t know that we know….” Ilsa jabbered.  
“No….Ils, babes…….Corm and Robin……they are obviously together…….it’s what we’ve wanted for yonks…..why on earth would we want to play with them over this? Aren’t we just thrilled?” Nick asked as the realisation finally dawned on Ilsa.  
“Robin and Corm are together Nick!......ahhhhh, yeah…….ahhhh, nice!” she cricked her neck to one side and just smiled widely. “Right…..you get the details from Corm, I’ll tackle Robin!”  
Nick shook his head at his wife’s inability to just let 2 people have a relationship but took a couple of beers across to his friend.  
Ilsa was carrying a bottle of wine over to Robin; Linda was chatting to a gay couple who Ilsa knew from work, one of whom grew up not far away from Masham, so she tucked her hand under Robin’s elbow and dragged her into a corner of the lounge.  
“So, come on……you’re not pretending anymore are you?” she grinned, “I saw your hand on his….let’s call it trousers!” she giggled.  
Robin blushed, but let out a subdued shriek and proceeded to tell Ilsa every detail of the seduction, walk back to the flat and as much detail as she felt an old childhood friend of Strike’s could handle. Bottle of wine finished, and about an hour later they rejoined the party.  
Nick on the other hand had a similarly detailed and intense conversation with Strike; lasting all of a minute;  
“So, you shagging her then?” Nick asked Cormoran, proffering the beer.  
Strike sniffed and accepted the beer, “Yep,” he nodded and smiled.  
“Worth it?” Nick queried.  
“Oh yeah…..God she’s bendy!” Strike replied and the pair clinked bottles.  
______  
The evening ended with hugs, kisses and taxis. Robin’s mum was returning to Masham the next day, but Robin promised she’d meet her to see her off. Then Robin and Cormoran were alone in the taxi.  
“If we go by last night’s theory, my flat is still closer,” Strike murmured.  
“Nah….I’m gonna make you wait this time…..my place,” and she gave directions to the taxi driver.  
“Damn,” he winced, knowing full well that he only had one condom in his wallet.  
“Don’t worry, I went to Boots……and yes; they are the right size….extra large!” she said, purposefully loudly in order to try to embarrass him in front of the taxi driver, who winked and raised his eyebrows at her in the rear view mirror.  
“My sister…..she just can’t get enough!” he shouted through to the driver as Robin’s face formed a silent ‘Ooooh!’ at him. 

Once at Robin’s flat they worked their way through the box…….and in the morning, the one in his wallet!


End file.
